Backyardigans Fanfic: Cheesy!
by MochiVee
Summary: Tasha and Austin are experienced cheese sellers in Wisconsin who have to deal with a very indecisive cheese conoisseur, Pablo, crazed Wormans, and of course, moldy old cheese all in their small cheese shop. Not a crossover, despite the category.


Tasha and Austin emerge from Austin's fence wearing some very strange outfits. Over Tasha's signature orange dress is a frilly yellow apron, and Austin has a simpler apron, also yellow. However, on their heads are the strangest hats ever.

Cheese hats.

"Oh, hi there. Umm.. you're probably wondering what's on our heads," says Austin, adjusting his hat.  
"Really, Austin? I thought they'd be thinking why we're not inside playing Grand Theft Auto like most normal kids," says Tasha.

Austin turns to Tasha.

"That's not really funny."  
"I wasn't joking."

Austin and Tasha look at the ground in silence for a while, then finally return their attention to us.

Tasha begins her explanation.

"No, Austin and I aren't insane. You see, we are professional cheese sellers. We've traveled all around the world looking for all sorts of cheese. Now we are about to return to our cheese shop in.."

"Wisconsin!" finishes Austin.

_We were toting our pack along the dusty Wisconsin road __  
__When along came a trucker with a cheese filled load __  
__He asked us if we'd seen some cheese as abundant and grand __  
__And we said, "Listen! We've got cheese from every land!_

"Hey guys.."

_Cheese from everywhere, man __  
__Cheese from everywhere, man_

"Um.. guys.."

_We've got: __  
__Blue __  
__Brie __  
__Gouda __  
__Cheddar __  
__Mozzarella __  
__Pizza cheese __  
__Nacho Cheese __  
__Third-degree-burning-cheese_

"HEY GUYS!!" shouts Pablo, deafening Austin and blowing out Tasha's eardrum.  
"Yeah?" ask Tasha and Austin.  
"When do you open the shop?"

Tasha begins to tap her foot, and Austin clears his throat.

"Ahem."  
"Oh.. uh, sorry and all for making you deaf."

"It's fine. We can still hear," says Austin.  
"What did you SAY?? SPEAK UP!" hollers Tasha.  
"I don't know! I can _barely_ hear myself think!"  
"EH? Stop talking about bears and let's go!"

Pleased at the thought of finally starting the adventure, the three friends grin at eachother.

"Right..."  
"About..."  
"NOW!"  
"Cue the music!"

The backyard theme begins to play, and Tasha and Austin lead the way to the cheese shop.

"Let's go to the Wisconsin Cheese Shop," Austin announces.  
"With floors and walls and ceilings, oh my!" says Tasha.  
And Pablo just has to add, "And it stinks really bad!"

A record scratches in the distance, and the transformation of the backyard is paused.

"You killed it, man."

Everything resumes as normal, and the backyard transforms into the interior of a simple shop.

There is a tiny counter that Tasha is leaning on and Austin is in back at the cheese storage room. On the wall behind Tasha is an enormous menu, listing all the cheeses she and Austin have to offer. It does reek horribly, but it is a good smell. The fragrance of all sorts of cheese merging together to become a single stench. Simply beautiful.

Unfortunately the two cheese sellers were not thinking the same thing.

"Oh for goodness sakes! Austin, open a window!" Tasha gasps, holding her nose. (Which takes both of her hands, since she has a giant snout with two nostrils.)  
Austin runs around the cramped shop looking for some sort of opening besides the already open door. It doesn't take long for him to shout back, "We don't have any windows!

Pablo just stood there, puzzled. He didn't have a nose. His face consisted of two eyes, two eyebrows, and a beak, all placed on the front of his sphere of a head. The expression on Pablo's simple face turns from confusion to shock. He realizes something.

I left the sink on in my house, thinks Pablo, beginning to shake in panic. Then, he noticably calms down. Oh well, at least I don't pay the water bill.

Pushing his thoughts aside, Pablo rings the little bell on the counter, and Tasha and Austin immediately line up there.

"May I take your order?" They chime in unison.  
"I'll have 102 cans of cheese whiz."  
"Um, we don't have that many cans of cheese whiz," says Austin.  
"Why would you buy 102 cans of cheese whiz? Oh for goodness sakes, that's madness!" Tasha exclaims.

Pablo crosses his arms and pouts.  
"I don't tell you how to live your life," mutters Pablo.  
"Okay, Pablo, why don't you just order a different... er, form of cheese. And not so much this time," suggests Austin.  
"But," says Pablo. "How do I know what to order?"  
"Just look at the menu," says Austin.

Pablo gazes up at the immense menu hanging from the wall. So many cheeses. He could swear that the words were peeling off from the menu and swarming around him like Can't See ' Ems. The list seemed to stretch into the great beyond, beginning to suck Pablo into a vortex. A black hole with no chance of escape. The already tiny shop was beginning to cave in on the poor penguin, it's walls closing in...

"Pablo!" Tasha's voice snaps Pablo back to reality. "Pick something already!" Her eyes glare as if they were shooting daggers at him.  
"Uh, one slice of gorgonzola!" Pablo says quickly.

Austin heads back to the storage room and fetches an enormous slice of cheese and begins to wrap it. Tasha digs out a cheese hat from the bottom of the counter and gives it to Pablo.  
"This is the cheese hat you get with every order," explains Tasha.

Austin emerges from the storage room and the wrapped gorgonzola is handed to Pablo. Pablo takes his cheese and plops it on his head. The gorgonzola molds to the shape of Pablo's noggin.

Austin and Tasha just stare. Finally, Austin breaks the silence.

"Sir, do you realize that you have a slice of our finest cheese on your head?" says Austin.

Pablo pats his head in disbelief.

"Oops.. Then I guess this is my hat," says Pablo, looking at the hat in his hand embarassedly. Pablo tries to lift the cheese off his head. It stretches a bit like pizza cheese, but it doesn't come off.

"Don't worry, we'll get you a new cheese," Tasha promises.  
"It's okay.. I really don't want to be a burden," Pablo says. He starts walking to the door.  
"It won't cost you extra," says Austin.  
Pablo zips back to the counter. "Make it swiss."


End file.
